this is real, this is me.

Didnt work today.
Slept till 12.30 pm this morning.
Hah. This is a good way for me to slim down.
I had my breakfast cum lunch at Bedok Inter with mummy. (:
Went to shop for grocery + CNY stuff at NTUC.
Bought alot of stuff & yummy food. Heh.
Went home after that & now Im blogging!
Hee`s.
I bought my contact lense too. (:
Heh.
Changed my blog song to this ' Love is Forever'.
Its one of the SPOP songs.
The lyrics are meaningful & exactly how Im feeling.
Hee`s.
Enjoy! ~
Gone to do my nails (:

Tmr is the month of FEB! ;D
Counting down :

7 mOrE dAys tO CNY eVe
8 mOrE dAys tO CNY
14 mOre DayS tO my bIrtHdAy (:
15 mOrE DaYs tO ValEntiNe day
19 mOre daYs tO jOeL's birThdAy (:
21 mOre dAys tO EliZ's bIrtHday (:

I wonder how long I can hold on to.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

3:12 pm

Me in the fitting room (:

Me again XD

My gfs & I ;D

Me (:

Alright, today didnt have to go to work. (:

But still, I went to T3 early morning with Joan, jie ping & Dominick to send our pri school fren, Jason off.

Jason is migrating to America.

When we reached there, Wei Shien & Aaron were there as well.

We were all quite emo when Jason left.

All the best, Jason. (:

After that, we all went to Mac to have our breakfast.

We chatted alot about our Pri 6 life & the fun we had.

Its so memorable. (:

At around 11am plus, we train-ed to tanah merah.

Joan & I headed down to Orchard while the guys went for their pool.

Shopped around Fareast & had our lunch at LJS.

I bought a belt.

Headed home after that.

I yearn to be one of the happiest woman in the world.

I just want to feel blissful & loved by the man I love.

Its as simple as that.

But until today do I realised only I feel it this way.

I wish to believe everything that happened to me over the past few weeks, its for a reason. A good valid reason.But somehow, i just dont see it. I dont understand why.Every night before i sleep, i wish upon that the nx day i wake up, things would be fine. Like how it always were after we bicker or quarrel. But it never happen. I know this is not another argument we have.

I am just a simple girl looking for happiness and i truly see that you can give it to me. I dont ask for anything more, i dont need you to shower me with material gifts, i dont need you to give in to me all the time, i can get used to that. I dont need all these, seriously.

I lost the battle.

Till the end, Im still left with nothing. ):

I know my birthday wish will never come true.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

5:50 pm

Alright, I've made my decision.
I chose Accounting as my first choice.
I very scared I will regret, really.
I really really very scared. =x
Well, last night was like a battle between MJC & TP.
I kept changing my mind for dunno how many times alr.
I actually decided going MJC but on second thoughts, I decided TP.
Sigh.
Im afraid that I wont score well in JC & end up going nowhere.
Cos my bro told me that JC is not only about passing every single subject, but scoring high grade for every single subject.
If u just pass all subjects, u might not get into Uni.
Sigh.
Right, I should just accept it.
I will not be with him anymore. ):
*Tears*
Since I alr made my choice, I should not regret.
I hope.

Now, I will work hard & get into uni & reach the hightest level of accountancy-ACCA.
(:
I will make it.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

8:31 am

Me (:

The cute couple cups given to us!

My orange juice & Red Wine :D

Yours sincerely (:

Me & Bro (:

Me before going Ngee Ann Poly open house (:

Mine! ;D

Mango desert at HK restaurant!

Lastly,

US again (:

Hee`s. Alright, I shall blog about last night.

Went to Park Royal Hotel for my cousin's wedding dinner.

The place is pretty nice although not very classy (:

Hah!

Chatted with my cousins & Aunts while waiting for the dinner to start.

The food there wasnt very nice & the service kind of sucks.

The waitresses there were all aunties & the way they serve us with the food are of low standard.

Ok, the dinner ended at around 11pm & we all headed home.

Tired.

Anyway, after attending the wedding dinner, I feel like getting hitch!

Hah.

Cos the couple is so sweet & romantic (:

But, the kind of wedding dinner I want in future is definately not the kind I attended yesterday.

Haha.

I like the one that my another cousin had for his wedding dinner.

It was held at forgot-which-hotel & that is wat I call b e a u t i f u l .

The place was Posh & romantic!

Hee`s. Ok I think I think too much.

Haha.

Thats all!

Tonight having class dinner! (:

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

9:57 am

Gosh! I still don really know wat I want.
But, I'll most probably choose TP accounting & finance or the hospitality course.
I don think I'll be considering JC anymore after talking to my bro.
I realised JC aint that easy anymore.
Now, the new education system requires them to take Econs which is like a exact GP.
I think I will die there.
Haha.
Poly will be my choice.
But, Im looking for ppl to be in the same course as me.
I don want to be alone ):
I want to be with my gfs but we seems to have diff interest.
I hope I can get into accounting with Qi Rong (:
Pls..God.

Sigh.
Actually, I don really know wat interest me.
Do I really like accounting??
Or iszit just the thought of earning alot in future & the position I will be having after I graduate?
I was kind of stunned yesterday when june quan asked me this.
He is right.
But, Im not sure either.
Sigh.

Tonight will be attending my cousin's wedding dinner! :)

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

10:26 am

Yesterday was the release of O's Results :)
Miracles do happen sometimes :)
I got my 5 distinctions! ;D
Yeah.
Im happy & satisfied , except for my maths.
I didnt get A1 ):
I let Ms Ong & Mr cho down.
Im sorry.
I got a B3 for english. Thats like m i r a c l e !
Haha.
Super shocked.
Hee`s.
All my gfs did well too. (:
CONGRATS!!!

After getting back our results, my gfs & I headed to whitesands Hong Kong restaurnt.
Joey gf treated us!
Hee`s. Thanks so much , joey (:
Headed home after that.

Now, Im in a dilema.
I don noe where I want to go.
Pathetic ):
Im so confused now.
Argh!
I hate to make a decision.
Bcos somehow, I will always regret my decision.
I hate that.

I once considered going JC.
But, Im afraid that I cant cope.
I have doubt about me surviving there.
But, Joel is going JC.
I wonder iszit becos of him that makes me wanting to go JC.
Is that the case?
Ahhh, I don noe. ):
On the other hand, I don really like Poly either.
Im not sure whether poly life suits me anot as Poly life is very diff from my previous 10 years of education.
Moreover, I don really like doing projects.
God!
I have no where to go.
Why isnt there a school that is perfect for me ?
I guess its becos Im imperfect.
Yes.
Haha.
Im crazy, ignore me.
Argh! Super Fan ar!

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

5:57 pm

Results tmr ): AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
No mood to eat.
No mood to sleep.
No mood to watch tv.
No mood to work.

Basically, Im mood-less now.
Lol.
Pls God, let me pass all my subjects with flying colours.
Please..Please...PLEASE.

=(

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

4:29 pm

January 21'08.
It should be our 18th month. ):

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

8:59 am

I crave to go back to the past and be me, and really just be myself.
Again and again, I keep telling myself that everything's gonna be okay.
Love is tearing me apart.
Work is wearing me out.
I hate my life now.

Many things are flashing in my mind now.
At least, I have this blog for me to channel my thoughts.
Now, Im truly, utterly hurt.
Its the period I felt the worst after I met him.
Sigh.
The only pleasant thing that happened to me past few days was :
being able to receive his messages again & promised to bring me out on our birthdays.
This is the only thing that slightly brightens up my mood.

Alright, I guess I have to move on.
And to you, thanks for still being there for me.
Though its not the same anymore, i am glad i still have you as my good friend.
Now, like wat u have told me, I wont hope for anything more alr.
I'll just take a step at a time.
But do you know that I still love you as much as last time?
I really cant bear to let go.
And I know somehow, Im courting my own doom again.
Watever it is, I will try my best to be okay.
I promise you & it wont be broken.

Memories (:
July'06 - dec '06 :

I rmb how u show ur care & concern to me since the first day we met.
It was the start of a new chapter in my life.
I rmb you lending me your eng notes when we had our common test & taught me patiently.
During the dec holiday, I had a busy yet happy life.
I had dance practices in school & we met at bus 17 bus stop near CGH and went home together.
I rmb the blissed face I had when you called me from Australia.
Also, I still rmb the worried look on your face on the day u went for your OBS camp.
I rmb how u got so angry with Arthur over some matters.
And I also rmb the doggy & pig softtoy that u gave me.

Jan'07 - dec'07 :

I had my most memorable birthday this year.
I really appreciate all the things that u do for me on my birthday.
Simple yet sweet.
The bear with six roses in a basket was my first valentine day present.
I knew u went to get it late at night after school the previos day. I simple love it.
I rmb the anxious feeling I always will have in the morning while waiting for u at tanah merah, cos u were always late.
Haha. Still, I miss the time when we go to school together.
I miss the wednesdays morning whereby we will have our breakfast together before going school.
I rmb the bottle of choco u gave me on our 6th month so that I wont have empty stomach.
I love the time going out with you cos I wont have to be afraid of getting lost anywhere.
And I wont have to get drench in the rain cos u will always have umbrella with you.
I rmb the days mugging in school with you during our O levels days.
All the sweet messages that u sent telling me to jia you were heart warming.
Prom nite was great with u around.
I rmb that day when we went shopping, my foot hurts & you were so patient to me.
I never thought it will be our last shopping session.
You accompanied me to work on my first day & it did helps me feel better.

Jan'08 :

All the sweet messages u sent makes a good start to 2008.
Everything ends here.
My first love. Gone.

Thanks for everything,Joel.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

2:14 pm

I realised something about myself.
I always never fail to contradict my words or actions.
Whatever i tell people ard me, it always turn out to be the opposite in the end.

I always thought persistence is all i need in this r/s.
In the end, my persistence turns to nothing.
This is not wat I expected.
I just want to talk things out. Iszit so hard?
I guess its abt time.
To let go of something that i always hold on so tightly all these months & refusing to let go, no matter how much I want him back.
Rationally, this is wat I should do even if my heart feels otherwise.
I don know how long I need to recover from this.
Maybe 1 year,10 years or never.
Cos after all, he has really became a huge part of my life.
And now, I have to treat him like a fren which I dunno if I can ever do that.
Maybe in time to come.

Ok, back to today.
Went out with trivia .
Thanks so much girl for cheering me up.
When i reached bedok platform, she said that she just woke up.
Lol.
Waited for her at the station & joey called me.
I almost wanna tear.
Anyway, thanks peeps for the concern. (:
I will be alright.

21 July'06 - 18 Jan'08.
Our story ended.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

7:16 pm

Goodbye. 210706.

Just let me be gone for a while.
I need time to let go everything.
I'll be okay after a while.
I need to stone & think things through.
My heart needs to be healed.
Whatever reasons u gave it to me, I accept them.

What should I do during my free time?
I am so used to seeing you & messaging you every single day, now wat u want me to do?
We have so many things to fufill, and now I can only treat it like it never happen.
Im devastated. Cos you hurt me like crazy.
I wish I can feel better.I need to. My heart is crying.

I need time. I will get used to this major change in my life.
Move on.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

9:19 am

HELLO!!!
Alright, Im back from the shopping session with Janice & CheYee. (:
Joey supposed to meet us but she last min need to work OT. ):
Ok first of all, we meet at pasir ris platform & then headed to Bugis.
Went to bugis street straight & walked around there.
Bought a belt & a small handbag for CNY :)
Aftermath, we headed back to Bugis Junction for our lunch.
We had our lunch at Pastamania.
As I am so budget, I had no choice but to buy the vegetarian pasta which cost only $3 plus after student price.
Argh!
Anyway, its quite nice also luh. :P
After lunch, we shopped around bugis junction.
I couldnt find a big shoulder bag that I like. ):
Gonna go find one another day.
Initially, we wanted to head down to T3 to shop but I was tired, so I headed home after that.
Thats all for today.
There is work tmr -.-

Oh, Che Yee, why cannot access to ur blog de? :)

Missing you.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

5:44 pm

Hello bloggie!

Hee`s...going out later with Che Yee & Janice. (:

Alright, I shall talk bout yesterday.

Mon, went to work as usual at 10am.

Work was alright, nothing much.

Anyway, I bought a organiser from Times at the airport.

I only need to pay $1 as I got changi voucher! :D

Hee`s.

I hope every month I can get the changi voucher.

This must depends on my performance le.

Finished work at 7pm & train-ed home.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

11:22 am

I FINALLY CAN USE MY COM ALR!!!!!! ;D
Ahah.
My com was spoilt few days back & now its back to normal! :)
Hee`s.
Past few days had been great.
Went to NYP, TP & SP open house.
Nothing much really.
Im in a confuse state right now -.-

Alright, as for today, I went to work in the morning as one of my colleagues took leave.
Left work at 3 pm & went to meet trivia for our shopping session at T3.
T3 is suppeerr nice & big :D
Bought some things there :)
Hah.
Oh no, I keep buying things recently =x
I swear Wanjun shall buy lesser things from now on. (:
Haha.
Ok, at 4pm, I went to take train home and trivia went to work.
Thats all for today.

Oh, Im really afraid of getting back results.
Its most probably on the 18th Jan which is the coming fri.
Thats like so fast luh! :(
Pls God, Let me pass all my subjects with flying colours. Please.
If I can get the grades that I want, It will be my best birthday present ever.
I swear.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

4:59 pm

Alright peopppllleee! Im going to work in 20 minutes time.
:(
I don like my this timing luh, like very long hourrrsss! =x
Whhiiiinnnneeeeeeeeee.
Sigh.

Anyway, on a happier note, dar promise to watch movie with me on fri after my work :))))
Yeah ;D
If he ps me again, he will have to treat me to choco fondue :P
This is our bet. Hee`s.
I hope I wont get to eat this. :)

Ok, got to go prepare alr.
Bye peeps!

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

8:33 am

Alright. Im stuck at home again -.-
Didnt work today.
From now onwards, I will only be working on mon,wed & fri.
As for mon & wed, I will be working the middle shift which is 10 am to 7 pm.
For fri, I will be working my usual shift, 7am to 3pm.
I still prefer my morning shift.
Sigh.

I so wanna go shopping but nobody to accompany me. ):
Sigh.
Have to wait till thurs & I will be going shopping with mummy.
:)
I guess I will buy alot. HAH.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

10:47 am

I always knew that looking back at the cries would make me laugh, but I never knew that looking back at the laughs would make me cry.
I still love you with every broken piece of my heart. I'm still wondering why you took it, then tore it apart. I wonder what I did wrong, that made you do this to me. I'm still hoping that one day, you will let me know ...

You trampled my heart and didn't even know it.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

12:45 pm

Second post of the day (:
I've changed my blogskin!
Hee`s.
I love this alot alot ALOT. :D
Haha, thanks to Cheyee Gf!

Im bored right now.
Nothing for me to do :(
Dar still sick & maybe Im going to make honey drink for him tmr.
Heard that honey is good for health (:
So, yupp.
Thats all.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

3:33 pm

PHOTOS OF THE DAY :)

Self OBSESSED XD

My certificate + voucher :)

My name + identity no.

Me again :D

Bleah :P

Me with my school uni :)

Hugging da zhu zhu :)

Alright peeps, Im back from the ceremony.

Its been months since I last wore my school uniform + school shoe,HAH.

Also, Its been quite a long time since I last tied up my hair.

Heh ;D

I miss school, seriously.

Anyway, today I went to the CC at around twelve pm & when I reached there, there was not a single soul.

I was shocked & went into the office to register.

I was expecting them to give me the no. sticker & show me to my seat but, they gave me the cheque + certificate instead.

I was like HUH!?

So fast gave me the certificate??

I don have to wait??

I thought got the ceremony & must wait for the VIP to come etc??

All these questions ran through my mind.

The person said that I can go home alr & I think that most prolly the VIP last min cant make it or wat bah.

Lol.

Anyway, I prefer it to be like that :)

I hate to wait for the VIP to come and give a LONG speech and I still have to wait for my turn to go up the stage.

Im a impatient person.

Hah :D

Headed home after that.

I am looking forward to tmr :)

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

1:20 pm

Hello! Im back :)
Went work early morning & today I saw joey! :D
Haha. She gave me a shock.
After work called trivia to settle some stuffs and went to meet mummy.
There is a change of shedule for my work for this month.
I will only be working 3 days per week instead of 5 days.
Its good luh can rest more but lesser money :(
HAH.

Went bugis with mummy just now for awhile.
Didnt bought anything :(
My foot hurts again.
AHHHHH!
Headed home soon after that.

Next week gonna get all my things on my shopping list:)
God, plllleeeaaassseee let dar get well soon.

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

6:27 pm

Hey bloggie! Im here to whine to you again. Hah.
Today work was fun ,fun & FUN! :D
I guess its becos im working with ShaSha, my source of laughter. Haha.
Oh, I just realised it today that the bangles sold in my shop are really pretty :)
I went to try on a few & I fall in love with it.
HAH.
I wanna get it but its damn ex luh, $44.90.
Anyway, my dearest Shasha said that she will get it for me for my birthday!!!!
OMG ;D Thanks so much.
Hee`s.
I've reserved it alr :P
Haha.I know its abit too early.
Hah.
Btw, I thought of organising an outing or something on my birthday.
Hmm..maybe KTV :)
Haha. I will ask my gfs for some suggestions first.

Back to today.
Went to meet my mummy after work and we went to buy some daily necessity.
Headed home after that.

I cant wait for mon to come :))))))))
Dar, pls get well soooooonnn! :)

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

5:12 pm

WAN JUN IS A HAPPY GIRL ;D
Ahah.
I shall not talk bout work today. Its just the usual stuff.
Today is the lst day of school.
I felt kind of weird in the morning when I saw alot of students at the mrt station.
I was once in their situation before. HAH.
Now, its alr Jan & its getting closer to the release- of -the -result- day. ):
I will feel very very scared thinking of it.
Hope I can pass all subjects with flying colours.
Pls.... God (:

Ok, on a different note, I cant wait for fri to come & of course next week too! :D
Friday will be going shopping with mommy after work.
I guess it will most probably be a window shopping for me as I havent get my pay yet:(
Sun will be going to community centre to get my award & I will be getting my pay too! :D
Monday will be going out with dar :)
Yeah, next week gonna shop till I drop dead:D

Get well soon dardar.
:)

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

4:27 pm

Lst day of 2008 :)
As usual, went to work in the morning.
Today was my first day working with Ai Lin.
She is a very nice person to talk to.
We talked bout lots of stuff during work, fUn fUn. ;D
Oh, I saw YingQuan twice today.
The first time was he came into my shop & we chatted for awhile then he left.
The second time was when I was about to go toilet & he walked past my shop again.
Hah.

Now Im rotting at home again.
I wanna go shopping but no cash alr.
I cant wait for next week :)
By then I should have gotten my pay! :D

Waiting for miracle...

You're the voice I hear inside my head, the reason that I'm singing

4:27 pm